Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Randomize