friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I will pee on everything he values.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
