It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
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