i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
