ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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