Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
