cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
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