R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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