doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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