Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
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