careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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