"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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