I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
