He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Ketchup is God's man juice
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize