lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
