so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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