He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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