The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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