Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize