gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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