He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
