I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
