my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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