my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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