his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize