So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
