Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize