therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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