piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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