We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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