Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
