I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
