i don't like sucking hair
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
