i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
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