Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
