There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize