Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
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