After last night, I could never be a politician.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
