sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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