got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
