We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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