I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize