omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
operation harelip BJ is a go
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
