My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Well I just put wine in my tea
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
