id be glad to
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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