Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
