She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
