too bad you live with your parents still
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
You know, be my cock's hype man.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
