Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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