i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
